Checking In ...
Her latest book-in-progress is titled The Geography of Loss and for it, she is asking the question,
I read that, and answered, reflexively,
And then I realized that that was not true.
I realized that that part of me is healed. I think about him, still. I wish I could pick up the phone. But the grief is gone.
The sadness that trailed me like a shadow after his death has transformed into run-of-the-mill missing. I'll always miss him. I miss him every day. There is so much we would talk about if we could. But grief it's not.
And then I thought about other losses in my life, relatively recent and profound. And I realized that I no longer grieve those either.
There are things in my life I would like to change. Will change. And I know that future grief awaits.
But for the moment, this moment ... and this moment ... and this moment, I am OK.